Pro 21:9  It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.

Pro 21:19  It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.

So, have you ever hung out in the corner of a housetop or out in the wilderness for any extended period of time? If so, what about those places would make them better than the space where anger is displayed?

I remember this wonderful tree we had in the front yard of the house where I grew up. What made it especially wonderful for me was the special place of peace it became in those moments when I was particularly challenged in my emotions by some domestic altercation between my parents or my siblings and myself. Though I was greatly loved by them and though they were and are a great treasure of my life, there was something better than being with them in the moments when their discontent was expressed towards me. In that tree I could find escape from the emotional turmoil of confrontation, and there I could obtain a sense of peace in seclusion. I actually had a few of these places, like the attic, my tree house in the back yard, and the very top of our roof, where I could run and hide from the distress that I couldn’t seem to deal with. Better it was for me to be removed from observance, where it didn’t matter what I had done, right or wrong. I discovered that if I could control my surroundings, I could know the peace that I wanted so much.

It really is so much better to be in a place where anger is far removed and your presence isn’t cause for angry outbursts. There is something that I’ve learned over the years of living with a wife and family of my own, however. There are still moments when I might long for those places of seclusion and still might seek them out from time to time, but I’ve found that the ‘better’ I found in the tree, the attic and the roof top was something that could be formed in the presence of my loved ones, not just in escape from them. There is something much better than the wilderness or the corner of the housetop for the one who is in relationship. By taking that precious one to the place of seclusion’s peace and experiencing it together, the real cause of the degraded dwelling place, the anger, could be removed and peaceful fellowship could be savored once again. Instead of just seeking out separation, a greater purpose of dispelling their anger could be embraced.

I used to think these verses from Proverbs were just criticism of angry wives, but upon reading them this evening, I believe there is more to be learned here than how much better it is to be far removed from a contentious relationship. Learning to bring them an atmosphere where anger has no place and love reigns is so much better. Finding a way to make their world one of joy and peace and living there together with them rises far above that alone feeling in the wilderness or housetop. This, after all, is the example displayed by the One who continues to knock on our heart’s door, even though there may be outragious events going on inside that door. He continually extends to us an invitation to a better place that disallows unbearable anger and inspires a loving embrace. I’m so grateful He doesn’t just run away to the wilderness or rooftop when I’m reacting in frustration. Instead,  with His presence He brings the peace to me and I can be transformed there in His presence rather than in His absence.

It may be an incredibly challenging concept to go towards the conflict with an atmosphere of love. It may take a complete transformation from what might have become an ingrained natural response, but there is something far better awaiting the heart that will take the walk of love that draws closer rather than further away. It will be much better and more than worth the change.

1Chronicles 16:27  Glory and honour are in his presence; strength and gladness are in his place.

Psalms 16:11  Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy; at thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore.

Psalms 31:19  Oh how great is thy goodness, which thou hast laid up for them that fear thee; which thou hast wrought for them that trust in thee before the sons of men!
:20  Thou shalt hide them in the secret of thy presence from the pride of man: thou shalt keep them secretly in a pavilion from the strife of tongues.

This entry was posted on Thursday, February 22nd, 2007 at 4:49 am and is filed under Peace. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.